Sunday, December 13, 2009

Gift meltdowns....and general Christmas tips??

Ok, so we had a situation today.....here goes....

My Dad visited for the weekend and I knew he was bringing Griffin's birthday pressie early. Id pre-warned and talked through the whole "Griffin will get a gift, but its his birthday & so there wont be one for you" etc etc and she seemed ok with that (sort of lol!)

So Dad mentions he has a little surprise for Grace too - and gives her an envelope.....with a gift voucher inside (K-mart)......IMPLOSION!!! Grace completely lost it for almost an hour. Luckily Dad understod she wasnt being ungrateful, and I will be on the phone first thing tomorrow to our speechie for tips.

Perhaps once she has been able to buy something SHE chooses, it will help her understand next time. Im just wandering if any of you have had problems with gift vouchers before? Birthdays and Christmas have always been a challenge, the build up, anticipation and expectations get the better of her. How do I get her to understand that

.......sometimes you dont know whats inside
.......sometimes someone else might get something she wanted
.......sometimes someone else might get 6 gifts, and she may only get 5
......it hurts people feelings when she gets angry or crys when opening a gift
......gratitued, even if she doesnt really like her gift

etc etc etc

3 comments:

  1. Its a tricky one....I always told Jamie that he had to smile and say thank you even if it was a "dumb" present, even if it was something he already had, even if it was something he wasnt interested in. Teach it as a script or a social story, because no matter what the gift is, the expectation is the same...you should always smile and say thank you..even if you are lying. Jamie quite liked the part where he was given permission to lie!!

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  2. it is so hard for our kids when things are not waht they expect. When my kids were little my Mum used to buy a present for both kids a little one for the happy unbirthday child sothat they didn;t feel left out. After all waiting for your own birthday when it is a while 1/5 or 1/6th of your life away is simply too long to wait.

    We went through the training of when someone gives you a gift thye do it because they love you. They dont know what it is you want even if you know exactly what it is so sometimes the gift is not always what you want and you say "Thank you so much, it's just right" or some such.

    On my dear sons first birthday after I split with his Dad we had a party in the park and SIL and her family came and gave him a gift. He opened it and said "I dont like it....(My heart dying of embarrasment inside).... Ilove it! he yelled at the top of his voice. "Phew" I am sure you could hear my sigh of relief from Melbourne lol.

    The social stories help. Also have a look at ABC online shop for Seasame street social stories. They have a few DVD series on social skills targeting all sorts of terrific things. there might be something in there on it.

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  3. Don't you love our honest kids. Kyle will even tell people if the present for his siblings isn't right. Kyle focuses on one thing he wants till he gets it then it goes in the back of the cupboard.If possible we get Kyle to cut out of the junk mail what b'day presents he wants but also explain we get some things exactly the same and some surprises. Compromising works well with him.

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